Today Ringo Starr made the startling announcement that he is the best Rolling Stone.
Starr, a shit drummer, went on the record to say 'People always bang on about Keith Richards or Mick Jagger. But back in the late 60s when we were at our peak and I was drumming it was me that led the band. They were a bunch of skinny hipped cocks'.
It was repeatedly pointed out to Starr that he was in the Beatles.
'Never heard of them. Sound like a parody band to me.'
Ex bond girl and wife of Starr, Barbara Bach, said 'Ringo hasn't been himself since he released a solo album that sold 4 copies. Last week he thought he was Chris Martin and tried to reconcile with Gwyneth Paltrow. She took out a restraining order.'