Watching your child in a school play is like dying from diseases it is not possible to die from it has emerged.
Mike Hetherington, 38 of Coventry, was rushed to A & E recently after watching his childs Year 3 production of Julius Caesar.
He has now recovered and had this to say of his experience.
'It was torrid. Some foetus with a PGCE, who was obviously a failed actor, flounced around, hoping everyone would look at him prompting the kids the entire time. Well you would have to wouldn't you if you were cretinous enough to stage Julius Caesar with 7 year olds.'
He continued 'Four hours it was on. Four fucking hours. My kid had one line. I felt any emotion start to drain away as a self defence mechanism.'
'I felt agitated and anti social. I started kicking the chair in front of me and grunting. Then I started rocking in my chair. My wife tried to calm me but her touch sent me scampering to hide by the horse and box and I passed out. It was then that the ambulance arrived.'
Dr. Gerry McDuff, senior consultant of doctoring, said 'Mr. Hetherington had all the symptoms of someone far along the autism spectrum. We caught it just in time.'
'We see this a lot when schools put on productions. We call it Traumatic Willing Autistic Thombolytic Lymphatic Intestinal Pulmonary Syndrome or TWATLIPS for short. It's a growing problem.'
