A global celebration of Yoga, the search through meditation and centreing on the chakras to inner peace, is being increasingly linked with violent outbursts it has been claimed.
Speaking from his police cell, accountant Ash Kennedy said 'If there is one thing that causes me to lose my shit, it's yoga.'
'All the stupid shapes and positions with their idiotic names like The Crane Fly and The Lotus and The Infected Camel. It makes me furious.'
'It's just a collosal pile of new age bollocks that people spend shitloads of cash on when they should be buying burgers and going to Alton Fucking Towers.'
'Stop acting like a cunt and enjoy your fucking life instead of guilting everyone else into a steaming pile of post modern, humility shattering shite.'
'Perhaps I could do with, you know, calming down a little.'
'Maybe a bit of yoga......'