David Cameron is to try to reignite late 90's 'Cool Brittania' with a wave of new cultural references inserted into cabinet meetings is has been announced.
After tucking in to Pringles, KFC and Greggs for lunch, The Conservative Party will partake in activities that are current and on trend.
'Firstly we will have a game of Pogs. That looks like fun.'
'Then we will break out the Coca Cola yoyos before having a jolly good game of Hungry Hippos.'
'We will also be using new and cool language. From now on, the negroes and coloureds will be known as 'blacks', the queers and poofs will be 'gay' and the Micks will be 'Irish'.'
'Women will still just be gaping wounds to fill with spaff though. We can't go too far. We are Tories after all.'