Failure to manage a monthly salary properly is becoming a more common problem it has emerged.
New evidence shows most people spunk their month's salary in the first week on booze and donner kebabs and spend the remaining 3 weeks of the month attemoting to cobble together a meal from the random ingredients they received from a drunken online Tesco shop.
'What can I honestly make from a tin of Lima Beans, Venezuelan coffee and drain cleaner?' said Ash Kennedy, office administrator.
'Last month I found in a block of frosty ice at the back of the freezer a three year old macaroni cheese that I was able to stretch over a few meals.'
'But I'm down to my last few days. Toenails and belly button fluff it is then.'