After Rachel Riley accidentally revealed the word 'slut' on Countdown, she is forcing producers to rename Countdown to CuntShit.

'I am sick of being made to look like a fucking tit' said Riley.

'It gets worse. One week we had 'bellend' which, if you have to spend more than 4 seconds with him you realise was created to describe Nick Hewer, the morose cock.'

'Then just the other day we had 'Japseye' which I'm not even sure you can say any more.'

'I'm fucking sick of it all and just want to spend half am hour screaming 'Cunts! Cunts! You're all cunts!' so I'm changing the title to prep the audience and viewers for the tonal shift.'

'Even Susie Dent is for it. We generally spend out time laughing at Nick as he fails to get through 10 minutes without needing to urinate, the old bastard.'


 
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