Finding you are the poor unfortunate who has the trolley with an annoying wobbly wheel is not grounds for bullet spraying carnage it has been announced.
Chief Inspector Ash Kennedy of Merseyside Police said ' There are many frustrations in life.'
'It is a constant nuisance that I'm hung like an infant. Or that I was born of unmarried parents.'
'But a wobbly wheel isn't grounds to maim 30 people with a blackmarket AK-47 and own brand vodka molotov cocktails.'
'Perhaps a bit of gentle consensual bondage, yes. Even a small bout of self harm and clinical depression I can accept. But mass murder? A tatch too far I feel.'
