After todays 4-2 drubbing at the hands of League One minnows Bradford City, Chelsea manager José Mourinho has criticised his teams performance.
'I am often the first to defend my teams performance.' said Mourinho. 'But today it was like watching mouldy treacle dripping off a wall.'
Mourinho was pressed on exactly what he meant as it is unusual for him to be so critical.
'Well imagine 11 men paid enough money to buy Portugal. Now imagine they are magical, and can attract huge quantities of shit to coat their stupid haircuts. That is what they are. They are cack enchanters.
Asked for his thoughts on his managers comments, Chelsea goal scorer Gary Cahill said, 'What does enchanter mean?'