Tony Blair, saviour of the middle east, cockney geezer and innocent of any crime, has been brought on board Ed Milliband's campaign.
'Wotcha don't know' said Blair 'is dis bloke 'ere, Ed, is a proper socialismist ain't he? He will proper sort out da country an' make da super rich pay more innit.'
Blair has helped Milliband by supplying figures on what limits to set for the highest tax band which is in no way just over Blair's annual earnings.
'Da rich 'ave to pay so the poor pay less. So we must use VAT to tax posh stuff like tampons and clothes. Oh and wheeler dealer business types? We'll keep your loopholes no bovver. Cushty.'
Ed Milliband is reportedly happy to have Blair around. 'He is an excellent statesman and in left leaning circles is hated more than me. I am close to crying with all these hard questions. Tony can take them all and give a winsome smile and every gullible prat will believe him. It worked 3 times already, why not once more? I want my mum.'
