After the controversy that surrounded the awarding of the 2022 World Cup to Qatar, FIFA has announced a new plan to ensure the matches will be playable.
'Qatar is hot, it's true' said Sergio Alboni, FIFA spokesman. 'When I was voting the heat didn't cross my mind as my pockets were too weighed down with cash. But since then it has become an issue.'
He continued 'We need to ensure the games are played in an environment where the players may actually survive for longer than 3 minutes. So we have chosen Mars. The Qataris have already got a slave labour force on the red planet as we speak.'
Asked about the logistics of such an enterprise Mr. Alboni said 'We will ferry everyone there in spacecraft and they should survive for a good 4 minutes which is 3 minutes longer than the summer midday Qatar sun. So it's good news all round.'
'Now excuse me, I have a call from my Swiss banker waiting.'