In the latest study on infant nutrition, it has emerged that breast fed children can grow retractable claws like Wolverine.
Professor Charles Langtree of Felchfield University said 'After yesterday's announcement that breast fed children will have a higher IQ, I can also announce the following attributes.'
He continued 'They will have Wolverine claws, the ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound and open really tight jam jar lids'
'In addition, they, like their parents, will lord it over other mothers who haven't breast fed their child due to either inability or time constraints and generally make them feel like shitty, scummy failures.'
Geraldine Johnson, a new mother who is unable to express breast milk said 'Oh look, another study extolling the virtues of breast feeding. Excuse me whilst I just go and fucking kill myself.'