Still unemployed Top Gear presenter James May has announced that he is Jesus.
May's mental state has been called into question of late with his tweets becoming increasingly erratic.
'I am the second coming. I will lead my people into paradise through organised tool cataloguing.
May's girlfriend, Barry, has expressed concern.
'Yesterday he tried to buff my head with a chamois leather and said I looked like I needed an oil change. When he came back from the kitchen with a bottle of olive oil and a can of WD40, I ran screaming.'
May's behaviour has also been compared to David Icke and his lizard conspiracies. Reptilian, green, and covered with scales, James May is 52.
