Cowboys in olden times were able to keep their clothes cleaner than any other people despite the nature of their work research has revealed.
Professor Charles Langtree of Felchfield Polytechnic said 'Our research show that cowboys had access to biological detergents long before the chemical industry invented them.'
'They combined the sap of a cactus, the milk from a horse and the tears of a child orphaned in an stupid gunfight and were able to keep their clothes super shiny.'
'I think they were also dirt repellent. Have you ever seen any of the old footage of them having massive fights in dirty streets and staying perfectly clean?'
'Their hair was always beautiful too. They must have had hair gel. Well, pig semen.'