The world's tits are in mourning today over the decision by Playboy to stop showing them in the pages of its magazine it has been revealed.
Speaking from the upper thorax of a female human being, Gerty and Ermintrude said 'There's nothing we love more than being unnecessarily exposed to idiots and perverts.'
'Often we discuss how we wish people would stare at us more, grope us and altogether treat us like pieces of sexy meat.'
'We especially love it when rich old men in smoking jackets photograph us for the masturbatory pleasure of the world's males. It makes us feel so wanted and worthwhile.'
'Because feeding and nurturing children is boring and so worthless as a job isn't it? Where the satisfaction in that? No, much better to be exposed and leered over by twats with too much time on their fucking hands.'