From the start of next month it will be legal to jam big sticks into the spokes of bicycles providing the cyclist is wearing lycra.
Following a nationwide consultation, politicians concluded their was no other group in society deserving of really nasty cuts with gravel in them.
Sally Mbangu of Cheltenham said of the new law 'It's a relief. All I want to do is drive to work without some tight-shorts wearing cock veering in front of me and ending up with his face inserted into my radiator.'
She continued 'I hate it when they jump the red lights or mount the pavement. So if I can keep a fuck off big stick on the passenger seat and ram it in their spokes at every opportunity I will.'
The law also stipulates that riders of pseudo 1930s step-through bicycles with baskets on the front can have the contents of the basket rammed up their fat arses.
