Men Across Britain will be tuning in to the Eurovision song contest this evening in the hope of seeing a repeat performance of the Polish butter churner.
In an act of conspicuous lying to their partners that they love the music of the Eurovision Song Contest, men will be surreptitiously staring at exposed tits.
'The suggestion but I am watching because there may be a brief glimpse of engorged mammary glands is scurrilous and deeply untrue' said Neil Helsby from Kent.
'I am a music lover and this is an exposé of the best that the entire continent of Europe, plus some other random countries, has to offer.'
'Now where are the fucking massive melons?'