As news emerges that the Conservatives will consider speedy evictions for immigrants from homes they pay rent for, the party has justified their actions saying that the European Convention on Human Rights does not apply.
Home Secretary Theresa May said 'It is morally wrong to turf people out onto the street when they have no other roof over their head.'
'But, and I quite specifically ensured I just said this, this only applies to people. Immigrants aren't people.'
'They are genetically leaches or cockroaches but are just wearing a human suit. Only those who speak with a received pronunciation accent from the Home counties with a property portfolio rented by the poor, qualify as human or people.'
'Everyone else, especially foreigners, are a sort of money funnel where all their worldy belongings are taken by someone called Roger or Clive.'
